Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Friends, Lankans and whoever else...

In the wake of the recent ruling by the supreme court of Sri Lanka, many political analysts (amateurs of course) have developed many theories. While most are so far fetched as to require a foot up the ass of the author, one in particular is scary because it is simple and direct.

The esteemed president it seems might resign her current post of executive president in order to contest the upcoming general elections in the capacity of Prime Minister. Now, for one such as her, this step down in public life is not at all an insult to herself, her family and her party because she will be able to retain some semblance of power. After all, 12 years of absolute power is not enough for anybody right? But the funny thing is, people with power always aspire for more power, and this theory highlights the complete lack of self dignity Madam President has managed to communicate to the entire world.

That being said, my faith in the people remains, but also my skepticism that yet another 'free and fair election' will take place also remains.

Now that the government has re-introduced the 'elections are near and so we will abolish taxes' policy, the people will be left sucking hind tit once again. The individual Sri Lankan is an intelligent individual, however, taken collectively we have as much intelligence as two rocks. So, people will fall for that 'dazzling' smile (who in their right mind thinks it is even remotely attractive?) fall for the short term relief in cost of living and yet again vote the blues onto the wicket. They will vote not with their minds, but because of whom their parents voted for, who their aunties and uncles worked for, because they met that VIP in some podunk function, or some VIP smiled at them.

Now, I would like nothing more than to be proven wrong on all accounts. I want my country to prosper and develop, not to remain labeled forever as a 'developing nation' (diplo speak for 3rd world) due to personal bickerings amongst so called leaders. While they are trying to find who farted in the elevator, the JVP is going to blow the cables. Revolution may not be that far away. Thats when the ethnic conflict will become the least of everybodys concern.

Monday, August 29, 2005

To wax or not to wax...

So, Matel (formerly known as Mr. M.P.) made one of his wonderful comments yesterday.

As the exam in the training was on the following day, me, Frodo and Matel were studying. Obviously we were really very tired and cracking jokes at the stupidest things. At a point in the discussion about the finer points of waxing the human body Matel came out with the following;

"is there a place where you can get your as*hole waxed?"

Frodo was rolling around the floor cracking up and I couldn't breathe. Once more was the observation made that it must be some really f*cked up people that come out of Oklahoma and Matel was their champion.

The weekend was spent mainly on the road as Frodo and I went to Happy Valley for a day to clear up where to leave what back there. Unfortunately for me, I was too exhausted to indulge in that towns favorite past time... drinking. It is not without reason that State College, PA is known as 'an alcoholic town with a football problem'.

On a different note, the lady from Lanka has come back and now I am happy. Very happy. We shall see what the year holds eh?

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Love and Hate Go Hand in Hand...

So, nothing really interesting happened to speak of, other than Frodo starting to speak (fake) Japanese. He insists it is easy to accomplish if you get yourself into a state of mind where you believe yourself to be constipated or frustrated.

Anyway, a friend of mine sent me the following few lines which were taken from the Washington Post's Rhymes competition which asked for the most romantic first line and least romantic (hateful?) second line. I think its pretty funny.

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I slept with you because I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty,and so is your head.

Kind, intelligent, loving, and hot.
This describes everything you're not.

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that bag from off your face.

I love your smile, your face, your eyes.
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005


It was a 'usual' day at training... We learnt a little about LoadRunner and then drowned in all the handouts given out. The amount of reading involved to stay abreast is unbelievable.

When we started Back End testing, Frodo (known before as Mr.A.M.) made the observation that 'it sounds dirty', which is true enough. I mean, to a lay person, what the hell does Back End testing mean? Getting a checkup for Hemmorhoids, Foliculitis et al right? But to the really gutter-minded, Back End testing has completely different connotations that I will not get into here.

Dinner was made and eaten while watching Kaal Ho Naa Ho (Tommorow may not be). It was an apparently sad film that I found very hilarious due to the comic nature of Rohit (Saif Ali Khan) and Aman (Shah RUkh Khan). The fact that Rohits housekeeper kept walking in on them when they were in 'compromising situations' made the hilarity complete.

Just as we were given some handouts with background information on XML, UML and RUP, I asked Frodo if he knew waht RIP meant (just for the hell of it) and he says 'Rrrest in Peace?, so I asked him if he knew RUP (Rational Unified Process) and he goes, 'Rrrrest your pus*y?'.

Later, when we were teaching fonts to a testing application, we used the sample phrase 'He is reading a book'. Frodo felt it necessary to change it into, 'He is reading a book with a finger up his as*'.

And that ladies and gents was another day at work.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Vicks in the brain...

So after wrapping up SQL in a day, the guys and I went home and chilled out till it was dinner time. Surprisingly none of us was tired so we just watched TV, popped in a DVD of Aishwarya Rai's music videos (it was already in the apartment... thank you very much) and studied a little.

Mr A.M. made spaghetti and franks and we had a good dinner watching "That 70's Show". Then we got on with our various phone calls as it was past 9 (Unlimited night and weekends makes life very cheap).

At around 10:30 Mr.A.M, Mr. M.P. and I were having a chat before turning in (Mr.S.D) was already sleeping when Mr. M.P made some interesting comments about Vicks Vapor Rub and its many unpublished applications.

He went on to elaborate on how people should put some on the female nethers 'if you aren't getting some' which prompted us to ask him what the hell kind of women he was hanging out with. THEN, when Mr. A.M and I were discussing the many pranks that can be played using a toilet seat Mr. M.P interjected with the comment, "Man you should put some vicks on your as*hole". Silence. Profound silence... followed by two emphatic WTF's.

At the end of that conversation, we came to the consensus that Mr. M.P was a little f'ed in the brain and needed to be avoided due to his unusual experiments with Vicks.

Another day, another crack up. Very funny.

Oh yeah, running into the bathroom this morning when Mr.S.D. was taking a dump and hadn't locked the door was almost as funny, but not quite as much.

Monday, August 22, 2005

Ayubowan, Hello, Namaste, Buenos Dias, Bon Jour and wahtever else you prefer

Hello all,

So, the komiya (me) has decided on this wonderful phenomenon (did I get it right?) known as blogging. This will be a multi-tasking posting dealing with politics (Hooray) with my two cents worth, advice for the needy (at your own risk of course, please await terms & conditions) and whatever else comes to mind. All in all, it looks like its going to be a lot of work.

Anyhow... I am a student from S. Thomas' College, Mount Lavinia (not from any 'branch school' ok?) who went to Penn State for my bachelors in Global and Strategic Management. Owing to the intense boredom because of too much time on hand, I tagged on an Economics Minor as well. Sigh.

Now, I am employed in a field completely unrelated to my degree... however, it does seem promising... balamukoo (we shall see).

My proclivities and activities in school and uni will come to light in the near future... but for now, this will be the lowdown. See, work is about to start and I can't get fired in the second week no? Must wait at least for the third week right?

Meeta obage senehebara wana ma (Yours sincerely... i think thats the meaning)